Monster Porn Monday

My monthly review of that sub-sub-sub genre of erotica ~ monster porn. 

I read them so you don't have to.

Erotica ~ Mature 18+

*Book source ~ Kindle Unlimited

Title ~ The Demon Bull Claims My Wife

Series ~ Cuckold Tells All

Author ~ Dex O'Donald

Publisher ~ Dex O'Donald

Published ~ 18 November 2015

Pages ~ 17

My Rating ~ 2 bites and a nibble

Thomas is hired by Mr. Nomed and is told to travel to New Orleans and take his wife Felice with him. Even though there’s something very strange about his new employer Thomas can’t afford to pass up this job, so he follows Mr. Nomed’s orders.

Poor Thomas. If he knew what he was getting into would he still have followed blindly? Mr. Nomed is not what he seems. He’s not even human and his name gives it away. Felice seems happy with the situation. Very happy. This isn’t horribly written, but it’s really short and a little bit tame compared to most monster porn. Ha! I said tame monster porn. Gotta like the cuckold though. I might check out more of this author’s books.

*Book source ~ Kindle Unlimited

Title ~ Taken by the Tentacle Monster

Series ~ City of Monsters, #1

Author ~ Angel Winter

Publisher ~ Angel Winter

Published ~ 18 November 2015

Pages ~ 38

My Rating ~ 3 bites

A mysterious laboratory accident, monsters making the streets unsafe after nightfall and a dumbass virgin walking home long after sunset. You see where this is headed, right?

Ok, first off, I cannot just let this one tidbit go: it starts at 6% and ends at 51%. Seriously. This is wrong, wrong, wrong. Do not do this to readers. Ever.  Also, that cover. What the fuck is she wearing? Tara The Dumbass Virgin (henceforth referred to as DV) is not wearing anything like this and the author’s name is not visible. Bad cover. I like the tentacles though.

Nearly everything about this story is asinine. The only redeeming feature is…tentacles! Sweet, sweet tentacles. Tentacles are like the ultimate monster porn appendage. They’re so damn versatile! And flexible! And plentiful! Unless you really suck as a writer, you can’t go wrong with throwing some tentacles in there. On the other hand, virgins who have their hymen so far inside them they’re practically choking on it is a huge no-no. Please take Anatomy of Female Genitalia 101. But I’m getting ahead of myself.

DV’s asshole boss makes her work late even though it is common knowledge that the streets are unsafe after dark. Instead of telling her boss to go fuck himself or threaten a lawsuit for having to work past dark, DV works late and then, instead of taking a taxi home, she walks the 20 minutes to her place. In the dark on unsafe streets. Then seems surprised when she’s accosted by a monster who wants to deflower her and get her preggers. Omfg! I’m done. Just die already. But she won’t because the monster wants her to breed his spawn. *sigh* Moving on.

*Book source ~ Kindle Unlimited

Title ~ Teddy Bare Collection

Series ~ Teddy Bare, #1-3

Author ~ Eden Redd

Publisher ~ Eden Redd

Published ~ 16 July 2015

Pages ~ 71

My Rating ~ 4 bites

This is a collection of three Teddy Bare stories; Teddy Bare, Stuffed and Plush Party. Each one can be read individually or in this boxed set. I recommend the boxed set because then you get the full-bodied furry flavor.

The stories follow Julie and her sexy older neighbor, Jacob. Jacob has a hobby and it’s called dark magic. He used it to create a buddy out of a teddy bear. The bear’s name is Spike. As a Buffy fan, that is just so wrong. The visuals in my head short-circuited every time Spike was on page. lol Anyway, Julie finds out about Spike the very wicked bear and then Jacob catches Spike giving Julie a high hard one. This is definitely a different kind of monster porn since a teddy bear isn’t really a monster, but it’s pretty hot. I know I will never look at stuffed animals the same again. Especially since book 2 has Spike creating two friends, a bunny named Eggs and a dragon named Drag. Between Jacob and the stuffed hornies, poor Julie is fucked nearly into exhaustion, so in book 3 she creates Yuki the unicorn to add to their strange family and give her a break. Well-written and imaginative, I’d recommend this boxed set unless you want to preserve your view of stuffed animals as only cute and cuddly and not horned up animate beings with BDSM tendencies and a penchant for orgies.